Life is change. There’s no way around it. Nothing ever stays the same, it’s always shifting and morphing over time, strange things become familiar, familiar things become strange. We set off on paths and encounter so many detours that our destinations end completely different. It’s all change.
I’ve always felt I was pretty adept at managing the ebbs and flows of life. I’m a roll with the punches kind of guy. I wasn’t when I was younger, but as I matured I found ways to manage the chaos and embrace it in search of a new future. Oh I was a ball of depression and anxiety half the time, but let’s separate the wheat from the chaff. Those things were often mental health challenge, and in this conversation that’s neither here nor there.
For the first time in a very long time, I’m struggling with change. It seems almost every aspect of my life is in a state of transition, and I’m having a hard time rolling with it. Not all change is good, and not all of it is easy. Sometimes our security is threatened, or the things we relied on become unreliable. Not all challenges are here to overcome and help us grow. Sometimes we’re just put through the wringer with no offering of better times on the other side.
I think it’s important in times like these to do our best to become present in the moment. Accepting our situations as they are can be really hard, and that’s okay. We’re not zen masters here, we’re ordinary people. But we still have to try. No matter what lead you here, it’s in the past and that’s it. It’s all done and you can’t go back to change it.
When life is chaotic and you feel like you’ve lost control, it’s important to lean into what you CAN control. It’ll help you manage the strain of dealing with your challenges. For me, it’s the gym. Working out and taking care of my body is something I can count and measure, and I control my level of effort. I’m the one in charge.
It’s hard to surrender your control to forces outside of your power. Most of us have the instinct to try to grab hold of it, try to bend it to our will. Fact is that may be impossible. And we have to accept it.
My struggles are beyond my control, and they’ve triggered a depression response. I can’t shake it. I’ve been in a lot of pain and experiencing a lot of sorrow, and there’s currently no end in sight. I’m doing the right things. Staying active, leaning into hobbies. Going to therapy. Staying on my medication and making adjustments where necessary.
In the end, I’m just going to have to trust that I’ll be okay, no matter what happens. And sometimes that’s it. That’s all you have. You’ll survive the challenge and live to fight another day. So will I. So will everyone. Hang in there